Attachment: A Theory Of Development Of Adult Relationships

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Attachment: A Theory of Development of Adult Relationships
Kristina Mihajlovic
University of Illinois at Chicago

As humans, building relationships between others is a form of connecting and communicating. It is a social situation that is experienced every day through the course of a lifetime. The initial relationship that is made is between the mother and the child. This bond that connects two people is known to be called attachment. The theory of attachment begins at birth, and from that, continuing on to other relationships in family, friends, and romance. Attachment is taught through social experiences, however the relationship with the mother and her temperament are the key factors in shaping the infants attachment type, which
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(Simpson et al., 2007) A general rule of thumb can now be applied. No matter how much you deny it, you will always become your mother! Mother’s actions echo through us as we live our lives day to day. How we handle friendships and acquaintances, and who we attract flirtatiously; all become a part our lives… a part of me and who I am today. I would like to reflect on the first study, and the theory of family quality. I highly agree that family interactions form us as individuals. My family interactions in adolescence times where very hostile and angry. As a teen, I could have been labeled as the rebellious type; however, since writing this paper, I came to realize that growing up in a first generation of war refugees may have been the cause of my behavior. My parents who came to this country not knowing any English, lost everything in the war, suffered from PTSD, never really trusted anyone outside of the family. Of course this was not their fault, however, this in turn skewed my view on friendship with others and everything else normal in America. Being an only child I didn’t have much to compare with other than shows on TV. I was not exposed to what is normal secure positive behavior. As I grew older and experienced other families, my familial view clashed with the societal norm in America, and I realized that my family’s views where completely different from everyone else’s; I wanted to have close friendships, like