4 May 2015
I believe I have overcome a lot in my life. I am a mother of two beautiful children, even though I have lost a little boy. I went into the military to start a career that I always wanted, but it was halted when I got medically discharged based off of a rare blood disorder we discovered when I lost the baby. I am currently in the process of getting my second divorce, even though I thought Jake was the man I would grow old with. My childhood was one screen writers would love to get a hold of, and yet I have overcome all of this and came out the other side a better person for it. One of my favorite inspirational quotes is “The stars cannot shine without the darkness.” I know that sounds a little cliché but it strikes home for me, and it seems to relate to everyone at least once in their life. For me it seems like my star shines brighter the darker and gloomier my life seems to get. I am a proud veteran, a super-mom, a smart person, and a women who loves to spread joy and that is a result of all the things I have overcome. When I was young, my parents got a divorce, and let’s just say the step parents I was given as a result would make Cindrella cringe. My step-mom did finally become livable, after I moved out and stopped competing for my dad’s attention, but my step-dad stayed true to his embodiment of evil until the day he died of a heroin overdose, or “heart attack” as his family states. Which was a miracle since my family and I did not realize he had a heart. He used to abuse my mother and us children in any way possible, and it took eleven years for my mom to finally smarten up and leave him. So my childhood was, needless to say, no fairytale but because of the things my siblings and I had to endure as children, we all became stronger adults who were prepared for anything. I can now keep a level head and shut off my emotions like a switch to deal with the difficult times that life throws at me, which came in handy while I was in the military.
I joined the Air Force to become a “career military” but after just over a year of service, I became pregnant, and in the beginning of my third trimester I lost my baby boy, Dallas. This heartbreak was a result of a rare blood disorder known as Thrombotic thrombocytopenic purpura, or TTP for short. This disorder is now controllable but makes pregnancy very difficult and life threatening for me, so I have undergone surgery to make it so I cannot have anymore children. After I lost my son and military career all within a couple of months, devastation did not begin to describe how I felt. It took me a very long time, two dogs, and my baby girl to truly get over that heartbreak, and the depression that followed me after that experience. However devastating it was, I feel like it makes me a much better mother today, for I now know how it feels to lose a child, and I will do everything in my power to keep a hold of the ones I do have. Evie and Slade are and always will be my greatest accomplishments.
Then we have the ever-changing experience of Love, Love is a very tricky thing. Once you think you have mastered its Art, Love betrays you and makes you seem like a fool. The man I married after high school was a mistake and I knew this, but it was my own way of dealing with the loneliness I had developed as a result to my childhood. Once I accepted this truth, our marriage suffered. It did not succeed once I realized I did not need him and the negativities he brought into my life, so I got a divorce at the young age of 21. Soon after my divorce, I met the father of my children, the man who