Within the text a subheading which reads depression speaks a whole deal of how he was struggling for identity; depression is which a person feels unworthy of existing and feels very low within their selves. This showing how he was not happy within his own skin, body and mind. Waite also goes on again to talk about his family, this shows the importance they hold within him; he believes his ‘actions had wrecked their family life’ you could interpret this that he no longer feels apart of the family because he was absent for four years. Stereotypically, a father does not do this, this is why he may feel guilty and believes that he had wrecked that family; wrecking something is when you destroy it or cause to damage to it. The damage he had caused was his family life. By Waite referring to his hostage as ‘low key event’ this shows that his self-esteem is low but also it’s a key issue in his life where as his family is more important which he keep referring back too. This again demonstrates his struggle for identity due to this being an event he should be celebrating – his freedom not heading deeper into the world of depression.
This goes further to link with the issues of ‘I had no contact at all with my family for five years’ with his family not knowing whether he was alive or dead, there hope to find him may of weakened within the years distancing the link he had with them which makes himself insinuate that he no longer recognises himself has a part of his own family. Although the capture is not his fault, the emotional outcome of it would have been put on his shoulders, making him feel the guilt and carry it around with him. This shows that a key part of his identity struggle was his detachment from his family. This is usually how you identify others, as part of being a family union; terry Waite’s disconnection to his beloved ones though were almost like him being put in a ‘jail’.
He then goes on to say ‘in solitary confinement, and I used to communicate with hostages in the cell next door by tapping on the wall in code’ this shows his struggle for identity was not only emotionally but also by being recognised has a human and not a ‘thing’ – being able to speak is what every human has the freedom to do. This quotation also shows the fear he had felt through the years while being hostage; this is also a struggle for identity due to him not being able to show his true character and personality.
‘for about nine months I depended on the news being tapped through the wall’ this phrase shows how significant it was and how he was dependent of a little news, this show that his life had now become a fraction of what it was. ‘Depended’ this could be emotionally as well has mentally; it shows a sense of venerability to him emotionally, because if the news were not tapped through he may of fallen more sullen about his position he was facing. Another reason of how it shows struggle for identity is that no secure person who he was before would be so dependent on another person.
By the captures