Dementia is more than a physiological condition, it is a relational condition that deeply affects those who care for, and about the person suffering from it.
Loving Someone Who Has Dementia is a book that gives revelation about how to live with a profoundly changed relationship that despite dementia, remains a relationship. The author is Dr. Pauline Boss, She is best known for her research as a pioneer theorist and clinical practitioner of stress reduction for people whose loved ones are ambiguously lost. Dr. Boss does not discuss the illnesses, and conditions that cause dementia, nor does she discuss the medical technicalities. The focus in the book is on the challenges, one faces relationally, when someone you love has dementia. Dr. Boss profiles “ambiguous loss” as having a loved one both here and not here, physically present but psychologically absent. The recognition of specific conditions in the world of ambiguous loss, allows you to deal with them positively.
The core of the book is a blueprint, which Dr. Boss presents seven specific guidelines: Find Meaning, Balance Control with Acceptance, Broaden Your Identity, Manage Your Mixed Emotions, Hold On and Let Go, Imagine New Hopes and Dreams, and Take the Time to Mind Yourself.
Each guideline offers demonstrated strategies for managing ongoing stress. The theory presented is when the application of the seven guidelines are practiced, a personal revelation on how to live with a profoundly changed relationship, despite the ambiguity of dementia remains a relationship.
Both of my parents have been diagnosed with different forms of dementia, and as their sole caregiver I found myself pulled from all sides, squeezed…