1. Be in a good state
When you are in a good state, you make good decisions. When you are in a poor state, you make poor decisions.
The reason behind this is a that poor state limits your thinking. When someone is in a stressful situation, and the current problem is occupying all their attention, their frame of reference is very narrow. Literally, all they can think about is the problem.
Einstein pointed out that you cannot solve a problem with the same level of thinking that created it. So making decisions from within the problem frame is incredibly limiting.
When you are in a very good state, with the ability to think creatively and openly about possibilities, your frame of reference can be, for all intents and purposes, infinite. This means it's possible to generate a huge range of options for yourself. And such a range of options allows for excellent decision making which is both creative and effective.
2. Make your own decisions
If you don't have an effective decision making process for yourself, LEARN
There are already many skills and abilities that you have decided are important for you so you learned how to do them. Decision making is a vital skill, if not the most important skill in our rapidly changing world of today.
It may often seem easier to allow somebody else to make a decision for you.
You can't quite make up your own mind, or you don't want to take responsibility, or you're trying to please somebody else.
In fact we unwittingly allow society, schoolteachers, employers, and the media to make many of our decisions.
And of course, all these decision-makers have their own best interests at heart. It suits them to have you agree with their decisions.
Which means that you end up compromising yourself or giving up a bit of your own life. And the only way to counteract this is to make your own decisions.
Or at least to recognise when somebody is making your decision for you, and to decide for yourself that this is okay.
This in turn means that you have to know something about the decision making process.
3. Put yourself first
It’s important to know something about yourself, who you are, your likes and dislikes, what your values and beliefs are, what is agreeable to you and what is not.
Making decisions that are not aligned with these things, or that go against them, would be a ridiculous waste of your time and energy.
And yet people consistently and repeatedly do things they don't want to, or don't do things they actually want to. Typically, by the way, so that other people can be okay.
And this may lead to resentment and frustration, which in the long-term may actually damage the relationship.
This does NOT mean that other people can go to hell and you always do whatever you like in spite of them!! Of course you consider others.
The idea is that you go first. That means others are second, third, etc… not that you ignore them!
And in intimate relationships, there will be times when you put your partner first, knowing that they will reciprocate… (if you think this is not happening, it may be time to fix it!)
4. Trust your own inner wisdom
If you've ever said ‘I know I shouldn't, but…’ or ‘I should do this, but…’ then you are overriding your own inner wisdom. And you even know at the time of making the decision that you are doing it!
At some stage, the decision catches up on you, and there is a price to pay.
If you want to
smooth out your life get rid of some of the hassle and stress do more of the things you want to be doing stop wasting your time have more…