Essay about Mother and Job

Submitted By jruzicka1
Words: 2612
Pages: 11

The issue I will attempt to dissect with the Awareness Wheel concerns an ongoing conflict with my mother. I believe that she will never get a job, even after the death of my father, who was the main supplier financially in our family. There will always be two sides in a conflict, and that is why I want to dissect this issue from a different perspective. I feel that it will aid me on what really is happening and how I should approach the situation.  The Awareness Wheel from my perspective:
 Sensory Data
 External Data o Every day I hear my mother say, “I wish we had more money.” Or “Wow, I just bought this beautiful dress and new pair of shoes.” o I see my mother on a daily basis, and notice she is doing a lot for her physical appearance more now than ever.
 Her hair looks much more groomed and looks like a highly paid professional cut it.
 She is using my dad’s life insurance to pay for a gym membership so she can keep herself in shape.
 When I’m not in school I see her buying clothes, shoes, and cosmetics online.
 Her actions are having an affect on my family… Let’s just say she could care less about my brother and I.
 Her hygiene as far as showering habits, brushing teeth, etc. is starting to increase as well… I feel like her actions are showing me that she wants to find another husband to take care of her. o She normally sleeps until around 2:00-3:00 in the afternoon… I understand she doesn’t have a job so she can wake up whenever she wants but still the day is almost over by the time she wakes up. o She is always out with her friends; either getting dinner, or shopping. o I have recently watched her lose a handful of friends because of her spending habits.
 Thoughts
 Beliefs o I know that we have always had things go our way financially, but now that my father has past she still thinks that we have more money than we do. She feels the need to hold that persona: that we are still upper-middle class, but we are not. o I believe that she does not think she will ever have to get a job, and that I will provide for her even though I am in college. o She has always been one to think that she can get a job on demand. But the fact remains that not many people are willing to hire someone who is in their fifties and has not worked in over twenty years. o I know that she is heavily influenced and persuaded to do things when encouraged by her friends who have more money than our family does. o I believe that losing her husband will affect her more and more each day and push her into depression.
 Interpretations o I do not think she realizes how much money she is spending. o My mother recently lost her husband and is currently having to sort out the work he left behind. She thinks that this will influence her to get organized and get a real job. o Because she doesn’t have a job and she hasn’t had one for many years, being unemployed seems to be a “norm” instead of being employed. o The fact that she has graduated from college with a degrees in Art and Marketing and still hasn’t acquired a job probably affects her mental state in a negative way, and going out with her friends, spending my dad’s hard earned money is her way to avoid the fact that her successes have yet to lead to desired results. o She could very well get a job at a restaurant as a server, but she has too much pride to allow herself to stoop that low. o I know that her father didn’t work once he left the military and her mother didn’t work because she was always sick. So this pattern is going to continue no matter what, because she thinks that I am going to take care of her for the rest of her life. o She is in a strange transitional period after losing her husband, all of her sons are either in college or moved out of town, and a lack of maintaining a professional career.
 Expectations o I believe that her laziness is going to progressively get worse unless…