My Experience With Clinical Depression

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Pages: 9

Unexplainable sadness, also known as depression, has been something that has taken a toll on my life for as long as I can remember. For years no one could see how much I was suffering inside, and I had no answers on why I felt this way. After thirteen long years of having no motivation and being upset for no reason, I was diagnosed with clinical depression. Ever since my diagnostic, I have been on medication to help regulate my emotions. Having depression has made me withdraw from the world many times throughout my life. My depression has never, nor ever will, define who I am as a person. Many people experience these feelings and can relate to the sadness that I feel. Knowing that there is others, and knowing the struggles people have overcome …show more content…
I have made many friends on my floor and have been doing very well in all of my classes. Being a pharmaceutical product development major was a scary thought for me during this past summer, but I could not be more sure of my decision. Overall, I have adapted well to the college life and have adjusted to the work overwhelming work load. Breaking old habits have set me back since I have moved into college. At home, I had a system of taking my medicine. As soon as I woke up, I would take it with my breakfast. I was not prepared to change this habit once I got to school. I started to forget and not take my medicine. At first, I was only missing it every so often, but as time went on, I was forgetting it more and more. I started to fall back into my depression, which seemed like i was unable to get away from. I started noticing major changes in my mood. It was not the sadness that I felt most often earlier in my life, it was the lack of motivation. Earlier in the semester, I got all my work done fast and as soon as I got it assigned. This was not the case anymore. I would procrastinate and do all my assignments at the last second. I would not completely finish my assignments. I had plenty of time to do them but I could not find the motivation to do them. As time went by, I started to get even less motivated and started to feel the random bursts of sadness again. I was struggling to even get out of my bed. I started to miss class or be careless and late for them. My girlfriend from home will come up to visit me and all I will want to do is lay in bed and I will feel guilty that I do not have the energy to do things with her. Every time I begin to take my medication I will shortly forget and have to start the whole process over again. It gets exhausting. I cannot get out of this long and painful cycle of feeling depressed, but I know this is something I will have to deal with for the rest of my