A Muslim woman expected to enter an arranged marriage in Phoenix was raped, beaten and sexually assaulted by her groom-to-be after she refused to marry the man
The report said that the families agreed on a "Nikah," a formal Islamic marriage. A’idah,who had no desire to be with Abdullahi, the man she was being set up with, ran away but returned about 15 days later to finish school.
One neighbor said that she saw the woman shaking and crying as she was dragged onto the sidewalk. She said she would have called police if she was aware of the situation.
Once in the apartment, police reportedly said Abdullahi placed a mattress in front of the door to prevent A’idah from leaving. Abdullahi managed to send a message to her friend from her tablet saying she was safe because her friend was texting her repeatedly and was getting no response and was extremely worried.
Leading up to the arranged marriage
A’idah’s father was up at night on arranged-marriage Websites and the result came to A’idah receiving strange e-mails from boys and going to random dates with strangers. A’idah says “getting random notifications from men has become so much a part of my dating life that I’ve lost sight of how bizarre it once seemed.” Abdullahi was just a random boy that A’idahs parents chose for her because his profile online seemed impressive and he had a well-paid job. A’idahs parents were struggling financially and their main priority was to look for someone that could support A’idah and eventually her family.
What caused A’idahs parents to arrange her marriage A’idah’ parents have had a long, healthy marriage and are confident that their happiness will pass down from generation to generation. A’idahs mother said “Our prospective husbands have to be rich and socially conscious, hip but down-to-earth,” but this is defiantly not the case for A’idah.
How A’idah is dealing with the conflict
A’idah tried speaking to her father about her feelings and how she really did not want to marry this man but her father would not accept this idea because it would go against their “family tradition.”
A’idah told her father that she wanted to go to college, however her father was completely against this as she was expected to start having children and tending to her husband's needs. This caused all of her life options and opportunities to be removed from her by her father.
As it can be seen, love and emotion do not come into play and this makes it extremely difficult to leave the marriage.
A’idah was being sexually abused and assaulted by the man she was forced to be with.
A’idah showed many forms of resistance, as she would often stay at her friends house to avoid both her parents and the man she was being forced to marry.
The abuse and violent threats from Abdullahi not only caused her to live in complete fear, however it also caused her to eventually take her own life
From reading several examples of arranged marriages I believe that indigenous knowledge systems conflict with the contemporary needs of women
Arranged marriages are the preferred choice of Islamic youth
Islamic Rulings say that if a woman is married off without her parents consent, then the marriage contract is invalid, because it was not validated by the parents.
Arranged marriages are the cultural norms for many Muslims across the world. Muslims do not “date” in the popular Western cultural sense, and many couples look to arranged marriages as a means to wedded bliss. Their expectation is that the seed for love is planted and will continue to bloom after the marriage.
Relating this back to the knowledge question the indigenous knowledge that A’idah’s parents had was passed down from generation to generation. The notion that A’idahs parents arranged marriage was successful caused her parents to be confident A’idah’s marriage would be just as great and that they…