I have this fear; it causes my legs to shake. My stomach begins to feel strange. My palms are clammy. I break out in a cold sweat. As thoughts of certain failure run through my mind, the world appears as a precious, treasured place. I imagine my own life full of success and then shrink back at the illusion of where my thoughts are taking me. Of course, it’s not really a fear of moving forward. Rather, it is the view of falling into obstacles far below me with no support to get through life ahead. The constant blow of daily life comes to a stop. Then I suddenly realized I have a purpose in life and that is to be legendary.
All I ever wanted in life is to become successful and help others. I can recall as a child my mother and father asking me “What do you want to be when you grow up”? I would reply “I want to become a doctor. Ever since I was born, my parents planted this seed of desire for victory, nurturing it with wisdom and care, and guiding me into the right path. Despite their efforts, life for me has not always been a crystal stair. I’ve suffered from my parents separating.. Many times, it was hard trying to get emotional support from my father especially during my teenage years where I needed a strong figure to show me how to make the right choices. It saddened me to have to witness my mother struggling to be a provider, live a double life as a dedicated mother and father, and be successful. But the sacrifices she made were out of love and she’s the reason why I am a strong young woman full of ambition.
Education is valued at a high pedestal in my family. My third great grandmother grew up at a time where it was extremely hard for blacks to get a good education. She had to work on the farm and look after her siblings. She was only able to get a 6th grade education, following her daughter who was forced to give up her education to take care of her children at the age of 16. Then, my maternal grandmother was forced to drop out of high school to take care of her son and daughter. So now, as the last young lady in the family, I plan to eliminate our previous generational curse. My venture will be to excel academically, socially, and spiritually to enhance the world around me. The sacrifices the women in my family made are the reasons why I’m adamant and determined to do the things they never had the opportunity to accomplish.
Throughout life I learned that success is something that doesn’t fall gracefully unto your laps, you must work hard to get it. During middle school year, I had terrible test scores and I hated mathematics. I can recall the countless hours I spent at night crying because I didn’t understand the math material. In class, I would feel isolated and ashamed to ask my teachers for help However, when I transitioned to high school, one of my teachers, Mr. Gifted who taught integrated algebra made math lessons that were easy to comprehend. He helped me overcome my fear to ask for help. I studied extra harder to pass tests and eventually I became a critical thinker and efficient in math. Now as a senior, I stand proud to be an honor student who is a dedicated member of the New Jersey Forensics Speech and Debate Honor Society. Having the opportunity to do