Every relationship has the potential to be destructive * Conflict with a lack of emotional sensitivity can lead to * Disgust with parner * Decrease in intimacy * Separation * According to John Gottman, best known for his work on marital stability, “fighting fair” when a couple disagrees can be beneficial w/ commitment and intimacy. This can happen when both partners * Keep the other partner’s emotions in mind * Use a sense of humor * Benefits of conflict are not found by other researchers * They can end in better understanding or resentment
Learning to Listen When a partner insists on communication and the other retreats, this leads to a destructive pattern of interaction known as demand/withdraw
Women tend to be more demanding and men withdrawing
When there is an unmet demand, this can lead to domestic abuse.
INTIMATE PARTNER VIOLENCE * Emerging adults experience more partner violence than those over 25. * Alcohol and drugs make violence more likely and more severe. * Rates are high and would be higher if self-deception and dishonesty weren’t factors but would be lower if preventative measures were in place.
Situational couple violence (common couple violence) * Fighting between romantic couples that is brought on more by the situation than by personality problems * Includes mutual outbursts of yelling, insults, and attack * Often, both partners are depressed, abuse alcohol/drugs, and physically punish their children * Both partners are victims and abusers
Intimate terrorism * A violent and demeaning form of abuse in a romantic relationship where the abuser isolates, degrades, and punishes the victim so that he or she is too scared to fight back, seek help, or withdraw * Leads to battered-wife syndrome * Victims need immediate…