March 31, 2013
In this paper I will be comparing two defend relationships, one will focus on the family (nuclear) side while the other will be on the side of close friends (extended family) and how they differ and the dimensions of controlee that lay within. Plus I will touch on a disagreement in both relationships and how both of the relationship is dealt in.
Starting with my family, the one key thing to understand about my emendate family is that my mother is the alpha or one could say that we have put her in the role of alpha. Or at least I have.
To kind of get an insight you would have to know some key facts about our dynamic. On my birth certificate I do not have a father listed. My mother gave birth to me at the age of thirteen years old in 1971.
I can talk to her about anything. Though it is not an easy affair for me to do at first but she can always read it on my face or for that matter hear it in my voice now that I am not at home any longer.
She has always said that in her eyes, her boys are grown at eighteen and that we were to act like it, within limits.
In my family it is customary to give a call on the birth day, well my last birth day I spent it alone and didn't hear from anyone but a close friend. My feeling were hurt, which lead my brother and I to get into a agreement which is something we do not do. We have not argued since we were teenagers. we did not speak for about four months. When I would call back home to talk to my mother she would ask have you taken to your brother yet? At first I was still hurt and would tell her that I have nothing to say to him.
I could see here frown come through the phone. The only thing she would say is that we were both being childish and that we were too old to be acting this way and that she did not like it and that was all she would say on the matter. She is a type of person that says what she has to say and every time I would talk to here during this time that was her one of the key things that she would vocalize to me repeatedly,
Since I am the eldest son I have to kind of move pass the hurt and take the first step in getting this thing resolved. Though she would not have said it, I am the one responsible for rectifying it and making sure that it did not get out of hand.
I consider myself to be a pretty good friend but I do have this way about me when it comes to forgiving my extended family because I feel that there is code of conduct that