8 November 2011
The Detrimental Causes of Divorce and How to Avoid it
Marriage has lately generated common interest and public concern and has been recognized as greatly important for our country. Marriage is beneficial to children, adults, and society at large. “Overall, the U.S. marriage rate has fallen nearly 50 percent since 1960” said Allan C. Carlson, who is the editor of Family in America Newsletter. Divorce is growing rapidly and some causes of divorce are infidelity, financial stress, stress having children with disabilities, and addictions. Even though divorce rate is increasing there are many ways to prevent it.
When marrying too young one is more likely to end up in infidelity which can ultimately end up in divorce. Infidelity is the state of being unfaithful to a spouse. Nowadays, it is hard to stay married during young adulthood because many think they are marrying the right one when in actuality they are in lust and not there for the long run. When teens are married infidelity is more likely to happen because, in most cases, the brain is not fully developed during teenage years to have a complete marriage commitment with each other. Furthermore, when teens or young adults get married, it is hard for them to be stable financially because they are still trying to figure out what they want to do. “Being married may cause teens to make changes to their plans for the future, which could include not going to college at all” (Child.Net). If one does not attend college it is very hard to have a promising career and to have a well-paid job.
Financial stress causes a division in a marriage relationship. According to Todorova, who is editor of The Six Financial Mistakes Couples Make, said “Numerous studies have shown that money is the No.1 reason why couples argue – and many of the recently divorced say those battles were the main reason why they untied the knot.” When people say “for better or for worse” they take it lightly and do not take into consideration the money. Donna Jenkins, who is a stay at home parent, said she remembered a time when her husband, Robert Jenkins, spent too much money on suits and did not tell her about it (Phone Interview). She was mad because they needed to pay the rent for that month. They discussed the issue and Robert eventually took the suits back. From then on he now asks for permission to spend on big items. When couples spend their money without discussing the issue with their spouse it can lead to stress which can cause a divorce. Having children with a disability can lead to stress which can eventually lead to divorce. For example, Donna Jenkins has a child, named Dynasty, with a disability called Holoprosencephaly or HPE (Phone Interview). HPE is a rare disorder where the piece between the lobes of the brain may be partially or fully missing. Robert Jenkins said when Dynasty was young she had to go to the Doctor’s office several times because she had many ear infections, trouble breathing, and mouth deformities (Phone Interview). Robert and Donnas’ time together was put on a halt because they had to care for the needs of their child and their other six children. Robert said “what kept our relationship alive was having daily bible study time with each other and individually” (Phone Interview). They knew that reading the Bible individually and together would help them to overcome the stress of caring for the needs of their child instead of arguing Jenkins 3 about not providing enough money to care for Dynasty or not spending enough time with each other which can lead to divorce.
Furthermore, addictions cause a division in a marriage relationship. Addictions like alcohol, drugs, and gambling can lead to divorce. Alcohol is one of the main addictions that lead to divorce. Krystle Russin,