Causes for Conflict in a Family
Instructor: Mac Newton
By: Linda Thach
Our families provide us with an atmosphere in which we live, grow, and develop. A family’s culture is established by the parents, and is reflected into their children. Family balance provides a sense of belonging to all the family members, and a feeling of security unlike many other relationships. When a family faces conflict, it threatens that security. Unresolved conflict may result in unrepairable damage to a marriage or an entire family, unless they seek help and guidance.
Anger is like a disease that eats into a person, and slowly moves into infecting the entire body of a family. Anger is an emotion that represents an important contribution to the overall power imbalance that arises between separating parents. Exhausting the other parent’s assets is a well-known strategy that is often used and is surprisingly encouraged by the legal system. There are many well-known reasons why people begin to slowly build up anger towards each other, family conflict can easily be a result of a workaholic husband whose wife feels lonely at home, and is resentful towards her husband and his chosen career path. Anger can be linked majority of the time to children, as parents and siblings we tend to know this quite well. With poor communication skills, we tend to express our anger by speaking out in order to be heard or to defend ourselves. Yet, if each one of us would take the time to sincerely listen, interpret, ask for explanation, and reflect, then many more families would be intact, rather than members being estranged from each other. One has to be humble and submissive to give way, and to understand the other person.
When it comes to accepting your family members, we need to remind ourselves to not made unrealistic expectations. There will be times when couples do not count the costs before getting married, so they enter this long term relationship with unrealistic expectations relating to finances. When starting a family, we need to devise a certain amount of spending, while cutting down on lavishing gifts, unnecessary spending and unreasonable desires. When children come into the scene or when there is an economic crisis which the family wasn’t prepared for, it tends to lead to family conflict. Sometimes unrealistic expectations can be from our parents, they tend to expect their children to hold various kinds of responsibilities. It’s not uncommon for parents to compare their children to other people, and their other siblings, these situations could possibly result in family conflict. Parents also tend to drive their children into certain career paths, children are pushed to pursue careers that politicians believe will be important to the economy years down the road. The latest “trend” toward controlled career paths comes at a time…