English composition 1 Essay

Submitted By totitetote
Words: 909
Pages: 4

More Style Tweaking—Revise/rewrite these sentences for better style
1. Although the student union is regularly populated by students, close study of the building as a structure is seldom undertaken by them.
The student union is regularly populated by students but they seldom undertake close study of the building as a structure.
2. He dropped out of school on account of the fact that it was necessary for him to help support his family.
He dropped out of school on account because he knows it was necessary to help support his family.
3. It is expected that the new schedule will be announced by the planning committee within the next few days.
It is expected that the planning committee will announce the new schedule within the next few days.
4. There are many ways in which a student who is interested in meeting students who are majoring in the field of engineering may come to know one.
A student who is interested in meeting students may come to know students who are majoring in the field of engineering.
5. There is trouble caused when people disobey rules that have been established for the safety of all.
People disobey rules that have been established for the safety of all so there is trouble.
6. The subjects that are considered most important by students are those that have been shown to be useful to them after graduation.
The subjects that have been shown to be useful to students after graduation are considered most important by them.
7. In the article written by Neil Postman entitled “The Educationist as Painkiller,” it talks about the classification of eight different kinds of sentences that he identifies as possessing the qualities of “balderdash.”
In “The Educationist as Painkiller,” Neil Postman talks about the classification of eight different kinds of sentences that he identifies as possessing the qualities of “balderdash.”
8. In our company there are wide-open opportunities for professional growth with a company that enjoys an enviable record for stability in the dynamic atmosphere of aerospace technology.
In our company, there are wide-open opportunities for professional growth with a company that enjoys an enviable record for stability in the dynamic atmosphere of aerospace technology.
9. Some people believe in capital punishment, while other people are against it; there are many opinions on this subject.
There are many opinions on this subject, such as: some people believe in capital punishment, while other people are against it.
Sentence Combining—Combine each group into one sentence

1. Their car is gassed up. It is ready for the long drive. The drive will take all night.
The drive will take all night because their car is ready for the long drive after gassing up.

2. Government leaders like to mention the creation of new jobs. They claim that these new jobs indicate a strong economy. They don't mention that low-wage jobs without benefits and security have replaced many good jobs.
Government leaders like to mention the creation of new jobs which they claim it will help economy although they don't mention that low-wage jobs without benefits and security have replaced many good jobs.
3. The American Flag is a symbol. This symbol is of liberty. It has been a symbol of liberty since 1770. Liberty is of great importance to the American people. Liberty is sacred to the American people.
Since 1770, the American Flag has been a symbol of liberty which is of great importance and sacred to the American people.
Revise the following passage, avoiding wordiness and undesirable repetition. There are a large number of people that…